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Pretend like everything is fine. Tell him you're willing to forgive him, it will just take you some time. Get a burner phone, start contacting divorce lawyers. Don't let him know! What he did to you is absolutely abusive, no question. If you let him know you're thinking of leaving he will almost certainly try to hide or lose assets (for instance, running up debt, devaluing any shared property, it's called dissipation of assets) or will deny everything and it will be your word against his. Document everything. Use your burner phone to take pics and send it to a new email account that you make and use ONLY on your phone, and hide that phone so that he can't find it.


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